Have you ever thought about this before?
Every single time you enter into a new relationship, accept a date request, or even swipe right and match with someone on Bumble, you will either marry that person, or you two will break up.
It seems like a weird way to look at it, but it’s true. There are obviously varying degrees of this: realizing it won’t work out with Bumble bae is a lot less traumatic than realizing it won’t work out with the person you’ve been living with for the last two years. No matter the circumstances, though, ending things with someone, or having them do the dirty deed, just sucks.
The flip side of this is together-foreverness. This is literally the only other alternative to an inevitable end. I know that it’s 2017 and together-foreverness looks different for different people, but, for the sake of simplicity, let’s just call this “marriage”.
Marriage is great when it happens.
I mean, I’m really just assuming it is since I haven’t really done that whole thing yet…
But it isn’t for everyone, and it simply doesn’t happen for everyone.
So you may be thinking, then what the heck is the point of it all? Why even date if you’re most likely going to just break up anyways?
The point is to enjoy the journey. Recognize and enjoy the happy moments, feel the sad ones and then let them pass, and realize when it’s time that it’s okay to go your separate ways.
Not every relationship was built to last the test of time. Sometimes relationships come into our life to teach us something about ourselves or about the world. Sometimes they come to get us through a difficult time. Sometimes they’re there just to add a little fun and laughter to our lives.
It’s important to learn how to appreciate relationships for what they are and why they were there. It’s okay to fall in and out of love. It’s okay to move on quickly, and it’s okay to take your time. Give yourself what you need in each moment, whether that’s to be in a relationship with someone else, or just to be in a relationship with yourself.
As twentysomethings, we deal a lot with relationships, whether we want to or not. It seems we are always beginning, ending, or thinking about them. We are giving friends support or congratulations about them, watching reality T.V. shows centered around them, and explaining to Aunt Gertrude at Thanksgiving dinner why we are not in them. It can be exhausting, but it can also be a lot easier if we are conscience of how we’re thinking of them.
Take each of your relationships for what they are, know there is a good chance they will someday end, and know that that’s okay, because there’s an even better chance that one day, one won’t.
Sending you all my love today and always, my little chickadees.